Sonya's boring life...
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Location: TEXAS, United States

This blog isn't for any prudes. It is known to be a little comical, a little sick, and sometimes X-rated. Then there is just the moments of pure boring stuff. Quote: 5% of our life is making decisions, the other 95% of our life is dealing with the decision we made.

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Hump Day


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Template by :Emily

Wednesday, April 19, 2006
 Martha Vs. Maxine (Hump Day)
*Martha's Way*
Stuff a miniature marshmallow in the bottom of a sugar cone to prevent ice cream drips.
*Maxine's Way *
Just suck the ice cream out of the bottom of the cone, for Pete's sake! You are probably lying on the couch with your feet up eating it, anyway!

*Martha's Way*
To keep potatoes from budding, place an apple in the bag with the potatoes.

*Maxine's Way *
Buy Hungry Jack mashed potato mix, keep it in the pantry for up to a year.

*Martha's Way*
When a cake recipe calls for flouring the baking pan, use a bit of the dry cake mix instead and there won't be any white mess on the outside of the cake.

*Maxine's Way *
Go to the bakery! They'll even decorate it for you.

*Martha's Way*
If you accidentally oversalt a dish while it's still cooking, drop in a peeled potato and it will absorb the excess salt for an instant "fix-me-up."

*Maxine's Way *
If you oversalt a dish while you are cooking, that's too bad Please recite with me the real woman's motto: "I made it and you will eat it and I don't care how bad it tastes!"
*Martha's Way*
Wrap celery in aluminum foil when putting in the refrigerator and it will keep for weeks.

*Maxine's Way *
Never heard of it!
*Martha's Way*
Brush some beaten egg white over pie crust before baking to yield a beautiful glossy finish.

*Maxine's Way *
The Mrs. Smith frozen pie directions do not include brushing egg whites over the crust so I don't.

*Martha's Way*
Cure for headaches: take a lime, cut it in half and rub it on your forehead. The throbbing will go away.

*Maxine's Way *
Take a lime, mix it with tequila, chill and drink!

*Martha's Way*
If you have a problem opening jars, try using latex dishwashing gloves. They give a non-slip grip that makes opening jars easy.

*Maxine's Way *
Go ask that very cute neighbor if he can open it for you.

*Martha's Way*
Don't throw out all that leftover wine. Freeze into ice cubes for future use in casseroles and sauces.

*Maxine's Way *
Leftover wine???????????
HELLO !!!!!!!

The trouble with bucket seats is that not everybody has the same size bucket.
Do you realize that in about 40 years, we'll have thousands of old ladies running around with tattoos?
Money can't buy happiness -- but somehow it's more comfortable to cry in a Porsche than in a Hyundai.
Drinking makes some husbands see double and feel single.
Living in a nudist colony takes all the fun out of Halloween.
After a certain age, if you don't wake up aching in every joint, you are probably dead.

I thought I would start you off on Hump Day with some Martha vs. Maxine. You can never go wrong with Maxine, right? LOL! Only 2 more work days left this week. Yeah! So, did you hear congrats was in order for Tom Kat? Yes they had a baby girl, I think. Also, what do you make of Angelina and Brad delivering their baby in Africa? Is this healthy? Just want to know your thoughts on these celebrities. Hope everyone has a great Hump Day!
Sonya said at 6:02 AM
Do you know anything about the birth of TomKat's baby? Did they do the whole silent thing? My thoughts, which they don't really matter about childbirth....the only person in the room to be quiet should be the husband - they need to try shoving a lemon out of their urethra, then we'll talk.
Ames - a lemon? I'm thinking a watermelon. LOL!
LOL, I hear Maxine. Thanks for the funny Sonya.
Well fuck, I HEART Maxine. NOT to drink more coffee. LMAO! (sorry)
EE - I love Maxine too. She is one of my heros. LOL!
I will take Maxine over Martha every time. Happy Hump Day :)
Ermmmm who is Maxine and who is Martha? And whilst we are at it - who is TomKat? Do you have cats as well?! :p

Happy Hump Day. Now if I could just get this camel to stop moving I might be able to climb off it's hump :D
just trying to put it in perspective....his urethra is pretty small you know.
Beading - agreed

Gareth - LOL as always!
Cute! I love the Martha/Maxine ones. I don't think I have ever had leftover wine.
Thousands of old ladies running around with tattoos AND fake boobs!

It surely will be a sight to remember!
Zombs - me too!

Barry - what will be funny is the wrinkling skin you can't really see what the tat use to be and no matter how wrinkle the skin the boobs will still be perky. LOL!
Ames - good point. LOL!
Cruise, Holmes Have Baby Girl Named Suri

Photo Credit: James Devaney, WireImage
Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes at the 'War of the Worlds' premiere

Tuesday April 18 7:40 PM ET

LOS ANGELES - The Tomkitten has arrived.

Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes, the high-profile pair dubbed "TomKat" by the media, had a baby girl Tuesday, said Cruise spokesman Arnold Robinson. The baby, named Suri, weighed 7 pounds, 7 ounces and measured 20 inches long, he said.

"Both mother and daughter are doing well," Robinson said in a prepared statement.

The name Suri has its origins in Hebrew, meaning "princess," or in Persian, meaning "red rose," the statement said.

The baby was born in Los Angeles but the exact location was not disclosed.

It's the first child for Holmes, 27. Cruise, 43, has an adopted daughter and son from his marriage to Nicole Kidman.

Details surrounding the birth, which was planned under the tenets of the Church of Scientology as a silent procedure, weren't disclosed.

Outside the Beverly Hills home where Cruise and Holmes live, about a dozen reporters and photographers stood by. Security officers inside the compound videotaped the journalists.

More on Yahoo! Movies

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A security guard at the gate refused to release any information. A few cars did arrive and were allowed into the estate. A police motorcycle officer stopped by around 4 p.m. and sat watching the goings-on.

The patrolman, who identified himself as Officer Chase, said he was just making a routine check, since activity around the area had been heightened for some time. He asked if the baby had been born, was told yes, and drove off.

It was just about a year ago that Cruise's romance with Holmes became a world sensation.

Cruise hopped up and down on a couch during an interview with Oprah Winfrey as he professed his love.

"I can't be cool. I can't be laid-back," Cruise declared at the time. "Something happened and I want to celebrate it."

The antics were widely mocked but Cruise was unfazed and continued to avow his affection for Holmes.

He and Holmes, a star of TV's "Dawson's Creek," had been first photographed together in Rome in April 2005.

She had previously been engaged to actor Chris Klein; Cruise had been married to Mimi Rogers as well as Kidman, and had dated Penelope Cruz for several years.

In June, Cruise announced to a Paris press conference that he had proposed to Holmes atop the Eiffel Tower.

"Today is a magnificent day for me, I'm engaged to a magnificent woman," he said.

No wedding date has been disclosed.
Who are martha and maxine?

I still can't believe Katie and tom BLEH!
Phats - Martha Stewart and Maxine is the old lady cartoons. Do you know now?

Katie and Tom is BLEH!
Maxine Rules!
Lori- yes she does!
wow, I love the new look!!!!
Jodes - thx! I guess it has been awhile since you have been here, hun? Emily did this for me last Friday.
D'oh! I know exactly who they are now thanks for clearing that up, I might have had a hard time sleeping tonight
hey!! I couldnt find you for so long and now you got a new look!! Love it! okie now I will post the thing ya tagged me on now that I can see u again hehe - have good one :)
I gotta tell you. I eat A LOT of ice cream cones. I eat about 15 per week. I'm not kidding.

Anyway, that marshmallow in the bottom idea is genius.

Please know you've changed my life.
I have heard these before and they are funny as hell lol

I have watched Katie Holmes since she was on Dawson's Creek... SHE deserves better... he is just a freak!
I don't do the celebrity following thing. Personally .. so they had a baby? BFD! There are hundreds of thousands of people that have babies every day, Tom Cruise is no different than anyone else. And there are many more people that lose babies everyday - we should pay more attention to that.
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